Journeys are interesting, whatever they maybe, however imposed, in retrospect always interesting. Largely, we choose where we go; doesnt matter if your Daddy's got a car, a scooter or a truck... man want to go, man will go... child dont want to go, gets two on its bum-bum, and will be forced to go. Tough.
Most journeys however, end up being ignored and earn an almost non-existential place in the pool of greys; that cesspit-styled, culturedly volatile, relentlessly ablutionary place... phew! In non-wiki-folks terms, easily forgotten. Mr.Mani says/quotes :
"Brevity is the soul of humour"
... I'm in short supply of all three.
Rapidly dwindling memory pools notwithstanding, some journeys migrate to mindly havens, replete with exaggeration and sometimes displaced in time... we are progressive. (disclaimer)
This is about one of those 'journeys'.
Take :
1 Swaraj Mazda
1 Rock Band
1 Rock Band Manager
7 Roadies/groupies/free-loaders
1 'Out-station' show
1 Long and winding road (bumpy too)
My first 'tour' with the band, also my first experience of being part of the headlining act! What thirrlls i say! Loaded with whiskey for the booze-partees, and Orbits... for me, we set forth... of course, not before Jungle Boy took a nice dump, while sadly, S.Yacoulb, the enormous homophobe, didnt. This partially set a 'drone' for most of the journey ...
S.Yacoulb : "I want to do kakka"
... nice.
While the booze-partees were getting drunk, I was getting queasy. Bus journeys are not for the weak of stomach. Enter orbit. Chewing gum helped prevent me from decorating the insides of the mazda with last night's dinner. So, i slumped in the back-most seat, menky-cap et al, ears protected from wind, while the baais made merry, and S.Yacoulb droned on; Annoyance Galore Inc.
Bad roads, pop songs, air laced with whiskey burps and nicotine, and the relentless drone of excretory yen. All summed-up to a soul filling experience of my first time.. . that is, travelling with the band. Made me wonder, is this what the "rock'n'roll", 'Band Scene' is about?
Smoke, booze and bad jokes..
Bumpy roads, queasiness and diesel fumes..
Long hair, tatoos and red-brassieres...
Most certainly NOT!... not red bras atleast... that was just S.Yacoulb at her prime.
Just when I felt my overbearing thoughts push me further into skepticism towards the whole 'Band' scene, amidst all that smoke, music and confusion, it happened... pragmatically magical, surreally lifelike...
...we all started singing. Just like that...
Time-out here, to refer a 'similar' scene from one of my all time favourites, "Almost Famous". That scene in the bus, where Russel Hammond, the lead guitarist, now wrapped in a towel, settles in after a night of flight. And Elton John's "Tiny dancer" sets in...
..as do the voices of everyone aboard, gradually.
Back to my story; we didnt sing Elton John. It was "Bed of Roses" by Bon Jovi, but what the hell...
It was pretty much like that... and yes, it was GOOD! It was a bonding of sorts, a 'come together'... right now, our own Lucy in the sky with diamonds, space truckin' across the universe.
With all our voices weaving complex overtones and harmonics of unrestrained cacophany, I felt like it was ALWAYS like this;
I was, am and will be here.
Thats what a 'Rock Band' is about... that feeling of allegiance, not in a jingoist sense, no. Its just good to be part of a tale; any part, even the tail.
Its good to belong.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Monday, February 12, 2007
Holy Bitches' Bazookas Batman, its the IRRELEVANT RACIST!!
Do you remember Robin? yes... Robin... the yellow-tight'd , black eye-masked, red vested -- green sleeved, 'oxford' hairstyled with kakka loads of mousse, *deeep breath* , diplomatic profanity shouting, loud mouthed.... waitaminut, what do i have against Robin? poor, sweet, orphan Robin... short, caped, just missed the ballerina squad Robin.... Mister 'look-at-me-i-can-fight' Robin... ROBIN.... I HATE ROBIN.. actually, i hate side kicks... lackeys, sycophants... reason : increase of conversation during moments of triumph...
"Holy Smokes BATMAN!" -- "Holy Teeth Batman! look out for that axe" - -
"Holy 'holy' chanting lackey side-kicks Batman!" "Holy..." OH SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!! BASTARDBITCHSLUTCORNHOLED........ SHADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!.....
phew! glad i got that out ... its good to have torrets once in a while (yes i know Robin.. i too, sense the redundancy... so, BAIMUCHKONINNAJJISHAATAHODILAUDEYKABAAL!!)
Verbal diarrhoea apart, its a piss-off when someone keeps talking INTENTIONALLY during something important... whether it be at a 'save the world from racoon-masked hooligans' day, or something as mundane as class.... and i'm not talking about while i'm taking a class... i mean, as a student, sitting in close proximity to certain junta from the right-bottomed coast line of India. I've heard women talk... and its nice... annoying, but nice nonetheless. However, try sitting around 'mudhuh-teng' speaking, class-interrupting, perpetually confused and 'muttery' mouthed MEN!
POLESMOKINBUTTRAMMEDFUDGEPACKERS!!!!!! ...bleddy...
No.. not simple, succinct dialogues like : 'pass me the calci' ; 'giuew me the rubbar' ;
' Sign-off Selva's name aalsow da' ... nooo, instead... prolonged, monotoned, low pitched pitter-patterish incomprehensible dribble, that resemble the audal character of a potato-fed cricket's gastric emission ... and to say nothing about the smell!
This staunch display of outright disrespect BANG in the middle of a lecture, can be prettty humiliating, NOT to the assmunchingtongueflexers , but instead, to those who hail from the same country.... quelle chagrin mon ami! Yes indeedy, every time 'that' section of the class' decibel level rises... and i MEAN rises... heads turn, throats turn parch, brows frown, butts shift... and yet, they go on yakking.... not even the holocaust would tear them apart...
"Say, whats that loud noise?? - - AaahNevermind lah ... then, after he said.... "
BLOODY BITCHES' BAZOOKAS BATMAN!!! DO SOMETHING!
Nope, no hope.... they'll graduate, with their well oiled kapi gulping pie holes, continuing to drench the rest of us in their mind-numbing dribble, and typecast us as a cult of uncouth, toddler-attention spanned motor-mouthed tribal hooligans... yeesh! too much hatred!
On the other hand, which btw, isnt so full of shit.... I have recently acquired a motor Bike! yes... nice 200 CC, 18(?) BHP , Honda Phantom.... yes, EXACTLY my kinda super hero, no super powers except brute strength and 'Tiger-buddhi', has a side kick that doesnt talk(!!) , and whose arrival is always preceeded by drum rolls... of course, just plain drum rolls to the 'naked' ear. But armed with a babel fish, we'd all know what the Pygmie Bandar were beating away to... no wait, that didnt quite sound right...ah BOLLOCKS!
I miss The Phantom; among most super heroes, this guy COULD actually exist! Think about it.. house in the jungle, gorilla for a friend, Pygmies (with poisonned arrows!!) as patrons... WOW... I'd like to BE him! and the suit!! man! what can be sexier than Purple?? NOTHING! The suit's actually required for the gun-holster.... those magnifcent semi-automatics! Its not a knife after all, much unlike Lord Greystroke a.k.a TARZAN of the apes! YOWZA! He was good, but no Phantom, certainly no 'Ghost who walks cannot die'. Man, Tarzan had some weird sense of fashion... the number of leopard deaths, just to stock up the Lord's wardrobe... last heard, Lord Greystroke had undie habbits akin to a certain Boy-band drop-out, actress dating, Jacko dance-move-copying, piss-ass 'singer'.... this, certainly exacerbated the ill-feelings of the leopard populace of a certain coastal region of Africa,( more because of the increasing resemblance to the afore-mentioned 'pop' star )... and led to a very gruesome death of the Lord... may his soul rest in peace.
Now where were we?? ah yes... Bike!
The Phantom also rides a bike... way cooler than an elephant, and for many reasons...
* A bike handles well
* A bike doesnt stop to take a piss near its favourite mountain
* A bike doesnt HAVE a favourite mountain
* A bike doesnt want to charge another bike if its hitting on some other bike
* A bike doesnt have its balls where its brains should be
Anyway, about my ride...
Here it is :
Sweet lil honey... hope it doesnt act up on an expressway!
I know most men prefer to append a 'she' to their bikes.... not me sir, A bike is NO WAY like a woman!
* A bike handles well
* A bike doesnt need to hang out with other bikes and talk about their respective 'riders'
* A bike doesnt compare genitalia details of its rider with other bikes
* A bike doesnt ask for flowers
* A bike doesnt want to charge at you, if you look at other bikes' bottoms
Must i go on? Well, bikes are known to be more dependable than women anyway, so there..... Theres that sexist feeling again.... .....Go nads!!!
"Holy Smokes BATMAN!" -- "Holy Teeth Batman! look out for that axe" - -
"Holy 'holy' chanting lackey side-kicks Batman!" "Holy..." OH SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!! BASTARDBITCHSLUTCORNHOLED........ SHADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!.....
phew! glad i got that out ... its good to have torrets once in a while (yes i know Robin.. i too, sense the redundancy... so, BAIMUCHKONINNAJJISHAATAHODILAUDEYKABAAL!!)
Verbal diarrhoea apart, its a piss-off when someone keeps talking INTENTIONALLY during something important... whether it be at a 'save the world from racoon-masked hooligans' day, or something as mundane as class.... and i'm not talking about while i'm taking a class... i mean, as a student, sitting in close proximity to certain junta from the right-bottomed coast line of India. I've heard women talk... and its nice... annoying, but nice nonetheless. However, try sitting around 'mudhuh-teng' speaking, class-interrupting, perpetually confused and 'muttery' mouthed MEN!
POLESMOKINBUTTRAMMEDFUDGEPACKERS!!!!!! ...bleddy...
No.. not simple, succinct dialogues like : 'pass me the calci' ; 'giuew me the rubbar' ;
' Sign-off Selva's name aalsow da' ... nooo, instead... prolonged, monotoned, low pitched pitter-patterish incomprehensible dribble, that resemble the audal character of a potato-fed cricket's gastric emission ... and to say nothing about the smell!
This staunch display of outright disrespect BANG in the middle of a lecture, can be prettty humiliating, NOT to the assmunchingtongueflexers , but instead, to those who hail from the same country.... quelle chagrin mon ami! Yes indeedy, every time 'that' section of the class' decibel level rises... and i MEAN rises... heads turn, throats turn parch, brows frown, butts shift... and yet, they go on yakking.... not even the holocaust would tear them apart...
"Say, whats that loud noise?? - - AaahNevermind lah ... then, after he said.... "
BLOODY BITCHES' BAZOOKAS BATMAN!!! DO SOMETHING!
Nope, no hope.... they'll graduate, with their well oiled kapi gulping pie holes, continuing to drench the rest of us in their mind-numbing dribble, and typecast us as a cult of uncouth, toddler-attention spanned motor-mouthed tribal hooligans... yeesh! too much hatred!
On the other hand, which btw, isnt so full of shit.... I have recently acquired a motor Bike! yes... nice 200 CC, 18(?) BHP , Honda Phantom.... yes, EXACTLY my kinda super hero, no super powers except brute strength and 'Tiger-buddhi', has a side kick that doesnt talk(!!) , and whose arrival is always preceeded by drum rolls... of course, just plain drum rolls to the 'naked' ear. But armed with a babel fish, we'd all know what the Pygmie Bandar were beating away to... no wait, that didnt quite sound right...ah BOLLOCKS!
I miss The Phantom; among most super heroes, this guy COULD actually exist! Think about it.. house in the jungle, gorilla for a friend, Pygmies (with poisonned arrows!!) as patrons... WOW... I'd like to BE him! and the suit!! man! what can be sexier than Purple?? NOTHING! The suit's actually required for the gun-holster.... those magnifcent semi-automatics! Its not a knife after all, much unlike Lord Greystroke a.k.a TARZAN of the apes! YOWZA! He was good, but no Phantom, certainly no 'Ghost who walks cannot die'. Man, Tarzan had some weird sense of fashion... the number of leopard deaths, just to stock up the Lord's wardrobe... last heard, Lord Greystroke had undie habbits akin to a certain Boy-band drop-out, actress dating, Jacko dance-move-copying, piss-ass 'singer'.... this, certainly exacerbated the ill-feelings of the leopard populace of a certain coastal region of Africa,( more because of the increasing resemblance to the afore-mentioned 'pop' star )... and led to a very gruesome death of the Lord... may his soul rest in peace.
Now where were we?? ah yes... Bike!
The Phantom also rides a bike... way cooler than an elephant, and for many reasons...
* A bike handles well
* A bike doesnt stop to take a piss near its favourite mountain
* A bike doesnt HAVE a favourite mountain
* A bike doesnt want to charge another bike if its hitting on some other bike
* A bike doesnt have its balls where its brains should be
Anyway, about my ride...
Here it is :
Sweet lil honey... hope it doesnt act up on an expressway!
I know most men prefer to append a 'she' to their bikes.... not me sir, A bike is NO WAY like a woman!
* A bike handles well
* A bike doesnt need to hang out with other bikes and talk about their respective 'riders'
* A bike doesnt compare genitalia details of its rider with other bikes
* A bike doesnt ask for flowers
* A bike doesnt want to charge at you, if you look at other bikes' bottoms
Must i go on? Well, bikes are known to be more dependable than women anyway, so there..... Theres that sexist feeling again.... .....Go nads!!!
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Aaaw....
"Nishu Darling,
It takes little time to digest that our little champ wielding toyguns of multiple sizes from KAVERI to KAMATH NIVAS has scored a quarter century credittably.At this stage we still remain your proud parents snatching a square share of joy in your fulfilment and accomplishment in every sphere of your discovery of skills,talents and yet to be explored latent potentials.
May your future endeavours bring you all the success and good fortune you deserve. We know you are strong and a DETERMINED YOU. You have proved it at your music,at your teaching at your silent counselling. Kick start your future with the best foot forward,upholding your faith and values and rest assured your dreams will come true because we are with you
Fond love and God's. blessings to you on this great day, your specal BIRTHDAY.
with lots of love'
MUM and DAD "
Ah! Parents!
Friday, October 20, 2006
Emotional Transgressions....
It's really funny how a dream makes you want to write.... I started blogging because of a dream i had.... and I'm back again because of ANOTHER dream.... something that spawns over mud-wrestling and getting caught at home, with a chick in your bed... dreams... what can I say? hear more of mine and you'll be clearing out your insides PRETTY soon......
A LOT has changed since my last post. I'm neither where i used to be, nor WHO, nor with who i prefer being.... *sniff* I can go on cribbing.... and hey! thats EXACTLY what i'm gonna do!
Being in a new place, tends to screw up the head thoroughly! I'm quite sure I'm a certified racist! I cant help but judge the people around me. Judge them on their attitude, their language, their mannerisms, their....almost everything. And apart from judge, I'm beginning to dislike them...... who 'them' ? nearly all of them! Yep! I'm getting that Hitler-ish feeling..... extreme Lau for one's race. So, I LAU my race..... but what IS my race? I really dont know.... for now.... i could say... anything but Chinese.... man thats racist.... but i've established that already....so, moving on.....
At home, i've mingled with so many kinds of people..... people who speak different languages, celebrate different festivals, have hazaar varied religious customs... then what is it about one race here... that totally PISSES me off??
Why is it that i get pissed when i have to repeat myself here? I used to do that almost all the time back home... but here.... no! its THEM! THEY HATE ME!
Why is it that I'm always 'on-guard' and crazily wary of someone discriminating against me?
ALL IN THE HEAD! all in the friggin head! Nobody's against me... nobody's out to get me (at least none that I know of....) They just are like that.... dont like to look around.... like to give people their space... or do they? or am i just rambling on about weird delusional conspiracy theories.... you BET I am! Lets get onto more serious things....
One of my students asked me.... "...how are the 'chicks' there " ..... truly I say to thee...."Seen one...seen them all" ... No, really.... seen one....and you've ACTUALLY seen them all..... now THATS racist! Racist to the CORE! Either racist or my disability to distinguish between the oriental women....and many times, men too.... Picture this.....
You're sitting in a bus, and someone sits next to you....on your right.... then somebody else sits next to you... on your left.... and being Indian,( sheessh...theres that racist hum again....) I have to look around... so... what do i see? someone on my right.... someone on my left.... except that its the same someone on my right, with different clothes.... " were'nt you just...?"-- Then I look in front of me... WOWZA! same! move ahead.... ready to step off the bus... glance at the driver.... fingers crossed, eyes crinched, toes curled.... yeah! one BIG eye roll.... SAME!!! They're really out to get me!
This is really not funny, atleast to those who may find it..... I grew up, considering myself a reasonable person, with certain values and beliefs... neutralistic in opinions and views. But this just bundles my conscience into a tiny lil bag and rattles it around my empty skull till my mind tells me....
"You're a Fuckin RACIST bastard!!"
Wonder what my soul was doing the whole time....
As I see it, racism is a product of frustration, stubborn dejection and Ego!
yes.... ACTUALLY a product...so...
FRUSTRATION x STUBBORN DEJECTION x EGO
actually, more a convoluted product.... so....
FRUSTRATION * STUBBORN DEJECTION * EGO
See.... racism cannot exist with any of the above quantities (or qualities...same thing) being Zero....
Hopefully, I'll be able to throw more light on the above three.... not right away though...... yeah.... you can run, but you cant hide! or you can move the mouse to the lil 'x' mark on the top right corner of the page and click it... or click once on the page and press Alt+F4...that should do it.
So what made me obtain the 3 charms? Quite a few factors.... but one strong factor to begin with....
was THIS :
Just another day in a bachelor's filthy kitchen... I'm washing.... la-dee-da...
Cool tap....eeed'nt it???
Now WAIT-A-MINUT!!....what DO we have here??
Is it some curd ?
or is it some stain ?
its.... its....
...What the--?
Yep! Exactly.... " What the -- " only!
When the pictures built by your mind get blown to gad-zillion lil pieces by the harsh reality that surrounds it, dejection projects its magnificent shadow and takes you under its wing, where-in it can crap on your mind and fill your empty head with its flatulent produce.
... in other words...
... shit on your thoughts and fart in your head!
Wonder what your soul does at that time...
A wise person once said...
"Never hold your farts in.... because, then it travels up, all the way into your head... and thats when SHITTY thoughts occur"
How true! how PROFOUND and true!
I'll be back soon.... more updates on life, reason and beyond.
A LOT has changed since my last post. I'm neither where i used to be, nor WHO, nor with who i prefer being.... *sniff* I can go on cribbing.... and hey! thats EXACTLY what i'm gonna do!
Being in a new place, tends to screw up the head thoroughly! I'm quite sure I'm a certified racist! I cant help but judge the people around me. Judge them on their attitude, their language, their mannerisms, their....almost everything. And apart from judge, I'm beginning to dislike them...... who 'them' ? nearly all of them! Yep! I'm getting that Hitler-ish feeling..... extreme Lau for one's race. So, I LAU my race..... but what IS my race? I really dont know.... for now.... i could say... anything but Chinese.... man thats racist.... but i've established that already....so, moving on.....
At home, i've mingled with so many kinds of people..... people who speak different languages, celebrate different festivals, have hazaar varied religious customs... then what is it about one race here... that totally PISSES me off??
Why is it that i get pissed when i have to repeat myself here? I used to do that almost all the time back home... but here.... no! its THEM! THEY HATE ME!
Why is it that I'm always 'on-guard' and crazily wary of someone discriminating against me?
ALL IN THE HEAD! all in the friggin head! Nobody's against me... nobody's out to get me (at least none that I know of....) They just are like that.... dont like to look around.... like to give people their space... or do they? or am i just rambling on about weird delusional conspiracy theories.... you BET I am! Lets get onto more serious things....
One of my students asked me.... "...how are the 'chicks' there " ..... truly I say to thee...."Seen one...seen them all" ... No, really.... seen one....and you've ACTUALLY seen them all..... now THATS racist! Racist to the CORE! Either racist or my disability to distinguish between the oriental women....and many times, men too.... Picture this.....
You're sitting in a bus, and someone sits next to you....on your right.... then somebody else sits next to you... on your left.... and being Indian,( sheessh...theres that racist hum again....) I have to look around... so... what do i see? someone on my right.... someone on my left.... except that its the same someone on my right, with different clothes.... " were'nt you just...?"-- Then I look in front of me... WOWZA! same! move ahead.... ready to step off the bus... glance at the driver.... fingers crossed, eyes crinched, toes curled.... yeah! one BIG eye roll.... SAME!!! They're really out to get me!
This is really not funny, atleast to those who may find it..... I grew up, considering myself a reasonable person, with certain values and beliefs... neutralistic in opinions and views. But this just bundles my conscience into a tiny lil bag and rattles it around my empty skull till my mind tells me....
"You're a Fuckin RACIST bastard!!"
Wonder what my soul was doing the whole time....
As I see it, racism is a product of frustration, stubborn dejection and Ego!
yes.... ACTUALLY a product...so...
FRUSTRATION x STUBBORN DEJECTION x EGO
actually, more a convoluted product.... so....
FRUSTRATION * STUBBORN DEJECTION * EGO
See.... racism cannot exist with any of the above quantities (or qualities...same thing) being Zero....
Hopefully, I'll be able to throw more light on the above three.... not right away though...... yeah.... you can run, but you cant hide! or you can move the mouse to the lil 'x' mark on the top right corner of the page and click it... or click once on the page and press Alt+F4...that should do it.
So what made me obtain the 3 charms? Quite a few factors.... but one strong factor to begin with....
was THIS :
Just another day in a bachelor's filthy kitchen... I'm washing.... la-dee-da...
Cool tap....eeed'nt it???
Now WAIT-A-MINUT!!....what DO we have here??
Is it some curd ?
or is it some stain ?
its.... its....
...What the--?
Yep! Exactly.... " What the -- " only!
When the pictures built by your mind get blown to gad-zillion lil pieces by the harsh reality that surrounds it, dejection projects its magnificent shadow and takes you under its wing, where-in it can crap on your mind and fill your empty head with its flatulent produce.
... in other words...
... shit on your thoughts and fart in your head!
Wonder what your soul does at that time...
A wise person once said...
"Never hold your farts in.... because, then it travels up, all the way into your head... and thats when SHITTY thoughts occur"
How true! how PROFOUND and true!
I'll be back soon.... more updates on life, reason and beyond.
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